* regardless of Tarantino's movie
The news, “man sues wife for
being ‘ugly’,” would be deemed absurd at first, but after much contemplation
will delve into the profound meaning and concept of woman’s aesthetics and what
urges her to do anything in the name of beauty and vanity.
The couple who made
headlines had a baby, who neither looks like his mother nor his father. The father
thought his wife betrayed him but it turned out, his wife had undergone series
of surgeries to achieve the face she possesses now:
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| from yahoo.ph |
The wife may have failed to
fully disclose her pasts to her husband, who in turn sues her for not being
true but we cannot blame the lady for undergoing a major physical overhaul—she
only wants to please her lord.
The surveyed and surveyor
Women’s
sense and view of self have been studied and explained centuries back then.
Literature in fact, has documented female’s way of thinking and feeling.
Women
have already been deemed as things and weaklings as early as the 14th
century, thus they are objectified by the opposite sex. Men look at women. The men
survey the women while they are aware that they are being looked and surveyed
at. Sequentially, the women deliberately shape their selves according to the
men’s fancy. In turn the men assess a
woman’s worth by her superficial attributes and place her ‘meaning’ in the
society. This determines not only the relationship of the surveyed and the
surveyor but also the relation of a woman to herself—on how she views herself.
Thus, women back then, and
until today, have always had mirrors on their beauty loot for vanity’s sake and
reaffirmation of their worth. Although seeing a woman ogling her face in front
of the mirror often hurts and annoys someone when done a bit too much, people
cannot blame a girl if she does it so. She is doing it to please the opposite
sex. When her looks is appreciated by the surveyor, she feels confident and
important.
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| from wikigallery |
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| by giovanni bellinni (from 1st-art-gallery.com) |
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| mieris |
This act of women looking at
mirrors to affirm and assess their physical appearance places men as the
subject/actor/superior and women as the object/inferior, but never vice versa. Hence,
there are few, if none, instances of men being surveyed by the opposite sex.
In many texts, a female character’s gaze into the glass is attributed entirely to vanity or the extreme pre-occupation with her physical self. Rather than acknowledging any deeper parts of her subjectivity, the mirror’s sole purpose is to aid a woman in validating her own physical beauty. 2 It is here that Berger is drawing on the psychoanalytic conception of the “gaze”—the state of looking at oneself. It is this “right” to visibility that creates an unequal relationship, for it places the man in the role of the subject and the woman as the object; she loses autonomy as she is always surveyed, yet she herself is never the surveyor. Culturally, the way a woman sees her own self is forged through how she perceives others—particularly men—see her. (Hermes, 2012)
Vanity fair
Modernity
however has not changed the way a woman sees herself and the world—it only
makes her more vainglorious. Technology and inventions have paved the way for extensive
superficiality.
The
media and the contemporary society have shaped and dictated how a woman should
be portrayed. The Philippine culture, more often than not, weighs and appreciates
a woman’s face value more than her substance. Other ethnicities have also their
standard of what is beautiful. This unwritten rule thus pushes women to resort
to vanity and narcissism.
The
issue of women’s vanity boils down to the urge of acceptance and satisfaction
of the needs of the opposite sex. I believe that one of the basic roles of a
woman (most especially those coming from a conservative orientation) is to give
happiness and fulfil the wants and needs of her lover—women in general are
genetically and emotionally engineered to play that role.
Let’s face it, we judge
someone base on his/her appearance despite knowing that one’s personality is
more important than the superficial. Yes, it is much more essential than looks
but since one’s appearance is the first thing people notice, some tend to focus
on their facial features above anything.
Will we be easily attracted
to someone who is not that pleasing? The answer of course is not. One’s appearance
is the first thing we see.
In a society that values
one’s face value more than anything, to stay ugly and repellent seems like a
mortal sin, considering that the market offers various ranges of beauty
products.
Going back to the couple who
made headlines, now who can blame the wife?
(Sa lipunang mapanghusga, tila kasalanan na ang manatiling hindi maganda
lalo pa’t malawak at marami ang paraan upang maging kaakit-akit.) But like
what is said in Filipino, aanhin mo ang
puro kagandahan at panlabas na kaanyuan kung salat naman sa kabutihang asal at
katalinuhan (or something like that).
Beyond vanity and
self-importance, there are a lot of factors to prove a woman’s worth, establish
her identity and strengthen her consciousness—like excelling in whatever field
she chooses. But sad to say, most fall into the trap of superficiality.
Sources:
Reflections in
Contemporary Feminist Literature, Theodora Hermes, 2012
Man
sues wife for being ugly, yahoo.com.ph
